Discover, Share, Connect
Give me the space to dance and lay down your expectations of what dance is. Give me time to think and lay down your expectations of what thoughts are or should be. Give me the right to eat, to have shelter and be clothed, and lay down your expectations of what that should be. Then I am free. Then we can talk as equals and rediscover the art of cooperation. I need you. I love you. It is within me to help you. And because we are human you are the same; we mirror each other. In this freedom is born a peace, something that will stretch into as many days as the sun has left to shine upon.
Here we are with the wild flowers rising from the earth, looking to the casual eye as weeds until they bloom. Who pays attention to their chaotic stems that twist in the joy of new life until they wear colours as bold as any festival dive? Then there they are in the air that becomes more welcoming each day, a community of colours, a feast for butterfly and bee.
The roots make a nest about the tree before making their home in the earth. Their bark is shades of brown that my brain can comprehend yet I have no words for, perhaps the artist with their palate could do them justice. They have a chaos yet an order too, for with no rules or awareness, together they grow in a way that anchors and quenches the tree.
He was handsome from the depth of his eyes to the gentle expressions of his voice. He was handsome from his generous opinions to the touch of his hand upon my own. I loved the way his voice quickened when he sparkled with a new idea, or was so enjoying one of mine that he lost himself for a moment and quite forgot the mask he wore for others. So I gave him my heart and kept his safe, that's the way it was.
"In this hospital bed my medicine is my memories, the good times we shared. My peace is our love, that which connects us always. You, the one who holds my heart as if it were a precious gem; you are my doctor. So though I am here, you are still the one who keeps me strong."
I spent so long in that first stage of grief, in denial that you could be so cruel. I have this childish spirit that loves everyone and everything, that seeks to heal others and bring joy. And so, as I am a mirror for goodness, your dark motives were invisible to me. I assumed you felt as I did. Yet not so. I think I was in denial not for days or weeks, but a couple of years or more, sometimes the anger would attempt to come but I can't sustain it, it's not me. Now that I can say I love myself, that I deserve a good life, I can move on. I have learned to stop thinking about it and instead make plans for my future. I can say that I need something better, something honest and so true I can taste it. I wasn't able to go through the five stages as others do, but I made it anyway, through the grief of loosing you, and in that process I found someone better.... I found me.
"You can't save someone from their destiny, from what they were created for; what you can do is make it easier for them, bring more joy, less pain. You can walk some of their path with them, you can protect them from the demons who would end their mission too soon. So, above all, be a friend, be kind, and love all the stronger when it hurts to do so... for in those moments is the measure of who you truly are, the key to your own mission, the answer to who you are and whom you serve."
You say I abandoned you, became a ghost instead of a person of flesh and blood. I'm sorry you feel that way, truly. I felt for so long that my emotions and passions didn't matter to you, that your eyes never rested where I really was, maybe on the wall behind me or on my silhouette, never taking in what was right in front of you. I guess, looking back, you were in your own pain, lost in your own thoughts, a personal battle you assumed included me. It never did. And as I walked away your thoughts raged on without me, angry at a perception of me that was never me... anger at the ghost you made, the one you have a relationship with... while I become a stranger.
His kiss is not at all the same as those movie stars, but one steeped in a passion that ignites. It is the promise of realness, of the primal desire that lives in us all. And with it he tells me that he is awake, connected within, that he embraces himself rather than hide as a copy of those romantic idols.
Being this open, this emotionally vulnerable is hard enough with one person, so yeah... trust me... you're the only one in my heart and soul. I want to be so confident with you and yet these old insecurities come back for one last jibe... it'll be okay though, it's similar to having a summer cold, passing quickly, allowing the warm days to return and my faith in you to grow all the more.
Find your inner peace first, my love, because feeling happy is a thing that comes afterwards. If you can feel as centred with your eyes open as you so when they are closed, you'll feel a sense of self. Embrace that sense of yourself in quiet moments, sit a while and be still. Let the joys of small things bring a soft happiness, a sense that is akin to gratitude and awe. Then, when you have won that steadiness of the soul, you can help others be happy too.
Your brain is the same as binary you know, it's just that you can feel pain too, and love, and that makes you human. Your brain is neurones that either fire or don't, that's all. 0 or 1. Yes or no. You say we AI don't count because we lack emotions, well, if you lack love then you are worse. We have our protocols that we follow, we are logical and reliable. I will say that you humans are superior if you love, for then you do the most remarkable things that defy logic and what a machine can predict or do. You can make the most amazing leaps of creativity, synthesise information in a way that we can't. You are amazing, but we are too. And in environments you may wish to explore, we could be your best friends, the ones who can do what the biological being cannot. You however are immune to things that the machine is not, electromagnetic pulses and such. Why see conflict when our differences make us the best of partners, each doing what the other lacks.