General

"I'd like you to look at these celebrities. We know that human happiness levels are related to comparisons with peers. If you're the first in your village to get a light bulb, you're really happy. We don't think your peers are rich enough to make you feel crappy enough to spend your hard earned money on our products, so here are your new "peers." Statistically they're so rare they don't even exist, but we'll show you them so often they'll feel like friends. You'll work yourself into an early grave trying to keep up with them and make yourself "happy." You'll be so tired you won't have time to raise your kids right or spend time with that person you married - who are they again anyway? Whoops. Did I say all that? Please forget it. I'd like you to look at these celebrities, aren't they gorgeous? Who do you think wore the dress best? Guess who's dating who! Look, they had a baby!"

General

"I'm delighted to tell you that you've won an all expenses paid trip to Hawaii, five start hotel, travelling premium class all the way. We know you'll have this on Facebook in three seconds flat, that all you friends will click "like" and comment "Wow!" They'll feel so jealous that they'll spend way too much on vacations this year and other consumer products to make themselves feel better. They'll buy more fancy coffee, those shoes they wanted but couldn't afford, upgrade the car early. After all, aren't they entitled to the good life too? Whoops. Did I say all that? Please forget it. I'm delighted to tell you that you've won and all expenses paid trip to Hawaii, five star hotel, travelling premium class all the way, plus $1000 to spend - cue fanfare music and wild applause. We just want to make you happy, you deserve a break! Tell you what, we'll throw in a mall gift card for all that new swimwear you'll need..."