When I was a very small child, I wasn't allowed to say I didn't care about anything, so I believed I had to care about everything. My mother used to say a little rhyme if I said, "I don't care." It's a sadistic little ditty, and it goes like this:

"Don't Care was made to care,
Don't Care was shot,
Don't Care was put in a pot,
And boiled until she was hot."

It's taken so very long to get out of that verbal trap, to climb far enough down into my brain to untangle the fuckedupness it caused. I can now feel free not to care. I don't care about assholes and selfish people. I realise that's the usual state of mind for normal people, but it's a brand new trick to me. I feel so free. Finally, fucking finally, "I don't care. I don't care. I don't care... unless I do... but that's my choice... because I say so."

By Angela Abraham, @daisydescriptionari, September 5, 2020.